Kisses in the Wind

KISSES IN THE WIND

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...
Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.
But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.
--- Unknown


Oh man, did this poem just break my heart. It so describes how I feel about this adoption process. I worry that she is waiting for us, wondering where we are. We sent our photos back in June.. and here it is.. September is just around the corner and we're barely any closer to going to China. I hope and pray that the USCIS Charlotte office will get our letter from Florida tomorrow and that our I-171H will go out by Friday. Please, Lord, I'm begging. (But like my new favorite song "Help Somebody" says "If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans." I am not in charge, I guess. For some reason, we aren't meant to go soon... But I have to say that if the wait to be DTC is this hard, then the wait for TA may kill me. ::sigh:: I'm so sad. I don't understand why much of this is necessary - but you give me a hoop and I'm going to jump through it... twice if I have to. I don't like to dawdle or delay when it comes to getting things done - but it seems that everyone else in the world is functioning their own speed... and the faster I go, the slower the world goes at giving me what I need to keep going! AGGGH.

Ning Ning... we are trying so hard to get there. We talk about you 100 times a day. Emma-Grace picks up the phone and says "Hello Ning Ning" and when she sees your picture, she says Ning Ning! It is as if she is waiting, wondering where her new best friend is... and I can't wait to get you two together. I don't expect some blissful meeting - I expect 2 toddlers who will have their moments of toddler-tude... but I know that she will adore you and that you will be loved more than any child could want to be loved. MacKenzie is already such a big help with Emma-Grace. She puts her shoes on and TRIES to dress her (Hard to dress a raging bull... ::grin::)

But this tough spot will be past us soon and when it's all in the past, we will rarely think of it... it's like the last 2 months of being pregnant. It's awful - but God let's you forget so you can do it again.... and NEXT TIME we're adopting a boy - probably a boy with limb differences or hand differences. I know a great OT!! ::grin::